We talked about whether it was really the loud volume that was so disconcerting to the parent, or the behavior behind it. Why is the child screaming? What does he/she need…what is the behavior all about? Ask yourself if your child needs more attention.
After some discussion there was consideration of whether the child feels left out of the family dynamic sometimes; as a girl spending time with her stay-at-home dad and brother, gender difference might be an issue; her communication style may be different from theirs; she may feel she is not being heard/seen.
Positive discipline says “a misbehaving child is a frustrated child.”
It was suggested to look for a pattern of when the child starts screaming and see if you can anticipate the behavior and divert it, by paying positive attention to the child or meeting a need that’s going unmet. Maybe having a game ready to play together, or a snack, or just giving undivided attention.
Try the “Parent Helping Parent” exercise, where you role play being your child and another parent roleplays you. This can be very helpful for seeing what’s really going on and how you each play a role. It builds empathy and might lead to some ideas of what to do differently.
Another idea was to “Date your children.” Go on a “date” with just that child, once in a while, so they have special time with you, apart from other family members. With multiple kids in a household, this can make a big difference.
Reading resource: The Explosive Child.
After some discussion there was consideration of whether the child feels left out of the family dynamic sometimes; as a girl spending time with her stay-at-home dad and brother, gender difference might be an issue; her communication style may be different from theirs; she may feel she is not being heard/seen.
Positive discipline says “a misbehaving child is a frustrated child.”
It was suggested to look for a pattern of when the child starts screaming and see if you can anticipate the behavior and divert it, by paying positive attention to the child or meeting a need that’s going unmet. Maybe having a game ready to play together, or a snack, or just giving undivided attention.
Try the “Parent Helping Parent” exercise, where you role play being your child and another parent roleplays you. This can be very helpful for seeing what’s really going on and how you each play a role. It builds empathy and might lead to some ideas of what to do differently.
Another idea was to “Date your children.” Go on a “date” with just that child, once in a while, so they have special time with you, apart from other family members. With multiple kids in a household, this can make a big difference.
Reading resource: The Explosive Child.